December begins

What I forgot at home today: never left home
Today’s meds: Ritalin, 54 mg extended release, 10am
Sleep: 12:30am – 8:30am (8 hours)
Exercise: none
Coffee: 2 cups
Work plans: 6 hours CivPro, 4 hours Contracts
work actually done: 2.5 hours CivPro, 1 hour Contracts
Other obligations: none
Wasted time: read the news of mass shootings online for 2 hours,
read some productivity blog posts for an hour,
took 6 hours to get breakfast and get started in the morning,
argued with spouse
Songs stuck in my head: “Pawn Shop” by Sublime

I spoke to my therapist this week. He is supportive of the idea that every hour I waste this year is going to be time that I will regret for the rest of my life. It’s been helpful so far in maintaining discipline. In addition to fighting my own internal struggles, I need to get my spouse on board with this idea as well. It should be helpful to start earlier in the mornings in order to free up some time later, but I am worried I will resent additional mental effort being spent away from exams. Talis vita est.

Veterans’ Day

What I forgot at home today: house key and school locker key
Today’s meds: Ritalin, 54 mg extended release, 10am
Sleep: 12:45am – 8:27am (7.75 hours)
Exercise: none
Coffee: 2 cups
Work plans: 4 hours CivPro, 4 hours ORM: 8 hours total
Actual work: 3 hours CivPro, 2.5 hours ORM: 5.5 hours total
Other obligations: housing, 1 hour
Wasted time: talked with a fellow student for about 20 minutes about nothing
Songs stuck in my head: none

Today was Veterans’ Day. It’s a sad reminder for me of the biggest failure of my life, which was not getting into the military. I don’t want to fail in graduate school – for the first time, someone else is depending on me, and I can’t quit with all of this debt.

It was otherwise a good day. I was exceptionally focused for the afternoon, but DM was a struggle. I caught myself leaving the conversation three times. There were several questions the professor posed to the class that I completely missed, but I’m confident I grasped the fundamentals of the lecture, which was the nuanced interaction of these two specific Federal Rules, and generally how to read and think through Rules that reference other Rules by way of reference. It reminded me of Object Oriented Programing, and how if one script calls another in a way it was not designed for, there are plenty of instances where an error is returned. But this isn’t a computer, it’s the United States judicial system.